Conversations - One Isn't a Lonely Number

Hey, I’ve been trying to reach you for a while

Really? The phone’s right next to me

Are you home?

No. I was supposed to meet this friend at a cafe close to home. But he had to cancel at the last moment

So where are you then?

At the cafe

Alone?

No. There are actually quite a few people here

You know that’s not what I’m asking

Yes I’m here by myself

Smartass

(pauses)

So why are you still there if this ‘friend’ didn’t show up?

Why shouldn’t I be?

Isn’t it weird?

Isn’t what weird?

(sighs)

To be alone … I mean ‘by yourself’ at a cafe. Don’t you feel like a loser?

And why are you being so difficult?

I’m not being difficult. I’m just trying to understand what the issue is.

Is it because I’m a woman?

Well … I wouldn’t go to a cafe by myself. It’s usually a place to hang out with someone over a coffee or something

Actually, I’m looking around me and there are 4 other single person tables

Four more weirdos

Have you considered that maybe you’re the weird one?

If I went to a cafe by myself, I’d be uncomfortably staring at my phone the entire time.

Is that what you’re doing?

Kinda hard to stare at my phone and speak to you at the same time.

But then you’re probably the guy who can’t watch a movie in the theatre by himself.

Absolutely not! Can you?

I do it all the time

You watch movies alone?

By myself, yes. I prefer it that way

How come I didn’t know this about you until now?

Maybe because you love to talk about yourself all the time?

That wasn’t very nice. Maybe true. But not nice

(laughs)

Shall I come over?

Why? To rescue me?

You sound like you could use some company

Actually I’m having a really good time, hanging out by myself. 

You should try it sometime

No way! So what were you doing before I called?

Waiting for you to call!

Really?

No idiot. Not really!

I was drinking my chai, having a slice of cake and thinking about stuff

What kind of stuff?

Stuff that I’d rather not share with you

Why not? Who would you rather share them with

They’re private thoughts. I’d rather not share them with anyone actually

What kind of private thoughts?

Private thoughts that I don’t want to share. Remember?

So how long are you going to be there?

Until I’m done thinking

Tell me where you are. I want to come think with you

Only on one condition

What?

We’ll do our thinking at separate tables

Of Mice and Movies

Recently I came across a mouse in my apartment. Which I found out, is not an uncommon occurrence in New York apartments. I had suspected that these creatures did make an appearance but I had never actually seen one for myself. So when I got out of bed a few night’s ago to get a drink of water and turned on the kitchen light I saw IT. We completely took each other by surprise and scared the s*** out of each other. He began running for cover and I muffled up a scream and jumped around a little, not knowing what else to do. A few seconds later, I saw it disappear into a crevice and I made my way back into the bedroom without the drink of water. My heart was pounding and I got under the covers and quietly went back to sleep.

The next morning I called the building superintendent who sent the exterminator who set up traps and did whatever else he was supposed to do. Gave me all kinds of tips on how I could prevent mice from returning in the future. But I haven’t seen once since and I’m really not one for following instructions.

Anyway, the only reason I tell this story is so I could have a clever-ish title for this posting!

So now I’m going to move on to movies.

Is it just me or did Hollywood hit rock bottom with the quality of movies last year? I mean if you look at the Oscar nominations for the past year, you have ‘Michael Clayton’ a mediocre ‘thriller’ at best which you forget as soon as you leave the theatre. ‘No Country for Old Men’ a much hyped movie about a maniac who goes about killing everyone. ‘There will be Blood’ – highly pretentious with an eye on the Oscars (just like ‘Babel’ was a couple of years ago). ‘Juno’, a heartwarming movie about a pregnant sarcastic, cynical and funny teenager, which deserved to make the money that it did, but an Oscar nomination? And finally ‘Atonement’ which I guess had all the ingredients to please the critics so I’m going to let this one go.

I was having a discussion about the recent mediocrity in Hollywood with a friend of mine and we both were of the opinion that they should have just cancelled the Oscars. “Sorry, but this year there will be no Academy Awards because we’re scraping the bottom of the barrel and still not coming up with great films. See ya next year … hopefully!”

I watched the latest Indiana Jones a couple of weeks ago. This was one movie I was really looking forward to and was extremely disappointed that it had received such poor reviews. So even though my interest had dwindled considerably, I eventually decided to go watch it. Maybe it was my lack of expectations, but I thoroughly enjoyed the film. I thought it had all the ingredients (masala) I was looking for. It had the pace, the adventure, the humor and the whole look! Loved it! Of course no Oscar nominations for this one though!

Another movie that I really enjoyed in the recent past is called ‘The Visitor’. A small film with no big names performing in it. Highly recommended. Don’t miss it.

Sadly, these are the only two movies that I’ve actually been glad to have watched this year. Slim pickings my friends. Is Hollywood running out of ideas? I sincerely hope not because we so look forward to original films from LA. And if Hollywood is running out of ideas, where is Bollywood going lift its ideas from (sorry couldn’t resist that)?

And I cannot end this ‘movie write-up’ without talking about one of my most favorite films that I watched once again this week – ‘Fight Club’. Every time I watch it, I seem to get enthralled by it even more! Of course the credit for the movie has to go to the book written by Chuck Palahniuk. I remember our book club in Bangalore read the book and watched the movie and all the women cringed. The men, on the other hand, thought it was the greatest! I never thought I would use the word ‘brilliant’ to describe any performance by Brad Pitt. He should be kissing the director's feet that he got to do this movie, by far his best. And Edward Norton, as always is outstanding. This movie probably has the most amazing and memorable dialogues that I’ve come across. My favorite line in the movie - the things you own end up owning you - Tyler rocks! And the entire premise is SO original, and if you think about it, SO pertinent. This is one movie that you either GET and love or DON'T GET and hate. There is no middle ground. Okay, I’m going to stop gushing now…..I just want to say that I even bought the script for this movie (the things you can buy on the streets of New York City!)

I could go on and on about movies but I’m going to stop before I lose each and every one of you.
I’m stopping.
I’ve stopped.
THE END (credits rolling).