Chapter 9

I feel like I’m on the verge of an event that will change my life. If not an event, then maybe a revelation. I have no clue as to what it may be. But I can sense it, feel it approaching, almost reach out to it. Not having the slightest idea of what this may be is oftentimes frustrating, though I can be quite patient when the situation requires me to be. And on the other hand, sometimes the suspense is quite thrilling.

If you’re wondering as to how I know this, all I can respond with is, ‘I just do’. It’s a psychic ability I possess that I’ve kept from the world until now.

If you’re thinking that I’ve finally lost it, my thought process is completely the opposite. I think I may actually be very close to finding it. Finding that one thing that is going to clue me into the next and possibly final chapter of my life. Not that I’m planning on dying anytime soon! It could be an extensive chapter. One that my gut tells me is going to be very different from my past.

If you’re thinking that I’m going to get married, then you are completely nuts.

This evening I was having a phone conversation with this guy, Rabi, who’s making a movie. During the course of our call he began asking me about all the things I have my fingers in. The catering business. The script that I’ve written. The restaurant. Why don’t I write a travelogue? Why don’t I conduct cooking classes? My corporate past making sudden appearances. Etc etc. As I mumbled through my responses unconvincingly, I jokingly told him that since he was in the process of finalizing the music and songs for his movie, I would be happy to sing for free. To which he responded, ‘Is there anything that you don’t do?’

There are of course numerous things that I don’t do, though for a moment I felt like Anusha, the airhead VJ in Delhi Belly. The one who wanted to sing and act and dance and have her own ‘clothes-line’!

Unfortunately although I have the ability to do various things, I’m not exceptional at any one of them. Which is not necessarily a bad thing, considering my track record of how quickly I get bored and how short my attention span is. I don’t agree with the negative connotation behind the ‘jack of all trades’ figure of speech. If I was a chef and that’s all I did, I would begin to hate cooking. I like the variety. The option to wake up in the morning and decide which hat it is that I want to wear today.

Actually there is one thing that I do better than most. ‘Nothing’. I watched ‘Eat Pray Love’ a couple of days ago. There was a sequence in the movie that I could completely relate to - the dolce far niente or the ‘sweetness of doing nothing’ scene. I’m a champion at it. If there was a contest for doing nothing, I would be a top contender. Unfortunately for me, it’s not a recognized skill, even though it should be. If you think it’s easy, try doing nothing for a week.

So getting back to where I started, my gut or my psychic abilities tell me that I’m on the verge of something big, a life directing event (or revelation). Not a financial event because I think having excessive money is highly overrated and losing what I have would really suck big time. Not a career type event because I would simply get bored after a while. Not a life partner type event because one of us would kill the other within no time.

Not that being in the poor house or in prison for killing my spouse would not be a life changer, but I’m pretty sure that it’s going to be something positive. Something that’s going to make me go, ‘Ah, so this is the new chapter of my life’. Something that will also make me go, ‘Duh .. how come I didn’t figure this out sooner?’.

Something that I just can’t put my finger onto. But I can almost feel/taste/smell it. The reason I decided to share it with all of you is so that I could come back and say ‘Aha! Didn’t I tell you?’